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6 ACTS OF SELF-KINDNESS THAT AREN'T JUST FOR THE NEW YEAR.

5 January 2019 6 comments

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Happy New Year! I hope you've enjoyed the holidays and aren't too glum about everything reverting back to normal.. I've had a few days break from BTB and social media at the start of this year and it's been really, really appeasing. But I'm back with a brand new and shiny post today, the first of 2019.

I've no real resolutions for 2019 (any day is good to start any lifestyle change or resolution?) but something I have been trying to encourage more within myself is to practise self-kindness. Because many of us could frankly do with giving ourselves more of a break.

So today I'm sharing 6 ways to be kinder to yourself, that aren't just for new year, but all year round.





EMBRACE WABI-SABI

The first time I saw 'wabi sabi' written down, I'll admit I read it as 'wasabi' and thought, I do like the stuff, but has it some kind of self-care secret I haven't heard of? ;)

Wabi-sabi isn't in fact a foodstuff but rather the Japanese philosophy (oh they are good with their wellbeing ideology aren't they?) of embracing the beauty of the imperfect, impermanent and incomplete (kintsugi also being in a similar vein) - something that I feel we all need to welcome and try to make a mainstay feature of our lives.

This book on the topic is so beautifully calming, I'd recommend a read!


CREATE A 'NOT-TO-DO' LIST

I am a big list writer, and it's not something I see myself giving up, but how often are we just filling up our lives (and paper) with things that need to be done? I tend to let unimportant or not-so-beneficial ideas creep onto that to-do list if I'm not careful, so instead, writing down a list of the things I really don't want to do anymore might be the new way to go.

Whether that's not looking at screens before bed anymore, not meeting up with people who make you feel sheepish or inadequate, not eating quite so much salt/sugar or not working through your lunch break, I always find that consciously deciding and writing things down helps to somewhat crystallise them in my mind.


A NOD TO EXERCISE..

The operative word being nod, as exercise is arguably my least favourite activity - other than perhaps getting up to fetch more panettone! (I say that jovially but it is indeed not a joke, which is plausibly why I'm the shape I am! We've a bit of a panettone glut at the moment after the festive season and I couldn't be happier about it ;) But even I can't deny that moving about a bit makes me feel good.

I suppose my point is that need not be joining the gym or starting exercise classes or anything formal, but rather a 10 minute jig to a favourite song, coercing your other half into a game of tennis or taking the dog for a walk. However you choose to move, it's a great way to be healthy for both mind and body.


MAKING AN EFFORT FOR THE EVERYDAY

The everyday tasks, like dinner, sometimes slip down the priorities list, getting lost among bigger and more pertinent tasks. But just because they're everyday, doesn't mean they can't be special.

Sometimes when F is away, I get out my favourite cookbooks (I'm enamoured with this one for example), head down to the farm shop to pick up some ingredients and cook myself a special dinner; a recipe I might usually save for a special occasion, using the best crockery, candles, and putting in the extra effort just for me.


SCHEDULING LITTLE TREATS

When I used to have my 9-5 (and quite stressful) finance job, I would try to create myself a little schedule of wellness for each week day to try and avoid feeling burnt out at the weekend.

A lunchtime walk around the lake, listening to a podcast on the way home, buying a magazine, a new cookbook, or a wellness book (try this one out for size), buying myself a bunch of blooms 'just because', baking something at home to take into work on Friday, going out for a slap up lunch, etc etc.

I no longer have the job but I still find that trying to or making an effort to treat myself to little things on a daily basis are the perks that keep me going.


LOOKING UPON FAILURE FROM A THIRD PARTY PERSPECTIVE

We're our own harshest critics, I'm sure we can all agree on that! And we're a lot kinder of failure when it comes to others.

Say your friend, sibling or other half wasn't successful in a job interview they really wanted, you wouldn't pick apart their performance or berate them for failing. You'd console and encourage. Yet we don't always do that for ourselves - at least, allow me to speak for myself here!

Making a conscious effort to look upon our own failures from a third party perspective allows us to be a lot kinder and encouraging to ourselves, and not be clouded by personal emotions, competition and perfectionism. So next time you feel you've floundered or fallen short, think, if I told my boyfriend, my best friend, my brother, my butcher about this, what would they think? I guarantee it's a far softer judgement than your own.


xx

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